http://alyx.livejournal.com/121260.html

As long as my inhibitions are this lowered, I might as well write something. I might as well write about what I am feeling and thinking. Why not? It will be a ridiculous rambling on livejournal. and livejournal can stand another one or two or ten thousand of those. Livejournal will be okay.

Okay, my little monkeys, wait while I get some more wine. The only problem with alcohol is that it wears off on occasion.

My darlings, my little lemurs, my cheeky monkeys, my readers, my anyone. If you were here with me, I would make out with you. If you were here with me, I would push you down on the carpet and hold you against the floor. If you were here with me, I would feel your body against mine. Yes, I mean you, Mr. Christopher Simon. Of course I mean you, Ms. Elaine Terry. I undoubtedly mean Mr. Alan Whateverthefuck his last name is, if he ever reads this. I absolutely mean you, Annamatic. I mean you, random reader. I mean Tiffany, too, but that's different, because it's serious and real.

What? What? Some thoughts. Wait. Let me get more wine. Let me piss again. I am that point of drunkenness when it feels like you have to piss every fifteen seconds. Do you know what I've been doing all night, ever since I got home from work? I've been drinking wine and eating nori and chocolate, and marveling at the wonder of teevee, and pissing every fifteen seconds.

Now I have had some food. Now I have had some water. Now I have had some more wine. Now I have had a second or two to think. Now I have had... now I have had nothing.

Some thoughts and ideas. I have compassion for people. I believe, I really and truly believe, when I am at my best, that every human is worthwhile. I believe that no one is beyond hope. I believe that everyone is worth something. Is worth everything. Is part of the universe. Therefore I am worth something. Am worth everything. Am part of the universe. Therefore, I am not beyond hope. There is hope for me.

Okay, I think I'm going to go pass out now. I have a feeling that in the morning I'll remember why I don't drink very often.

Published by :alyx 2006-09-22 02:10:04.0